Book Reviews
Book Review: “Widows’ Words”
The covers on the other side of the bed are barely rumpled these days.
There’s just one toothbrush in the holder, one plate at the table, one coffee cup in the sink. You didn’t want this, weren’t expecting it, wish it wasn’t happening but here it is, and in “Widows’ Words” by various writers, edited by Nan Bauer-Maglin, you’re absolutely not alone.
Welcome to the club. The rules are simple.
The first one is that no matter how many well-meaning people came to you in the minutes, days, or weeks after your husband’s funeral, your grief is different than theirs. Everyone heals in their own way, and in their own time but you’ve got sisters who’ve been where you are.
In this book, 43 of them offer their experiences, organized into five categories to match readers’ stages.
It starts with the moment of diagnosis, the disbelief that it’s happening, the absurdity of seeing X-rays of your husband’s head. It’s holding your wife’s hand as she dies by her own choice. It’s getting six premature, unwanted copies of a book on grief.
After the funeral, a hundred chores need tending; untangling money matters may be the first, most pressing one, but so are the necessities of cleaning out his closet and his office. You may rely on God, or rant at Him. Milestones will sting: his birthday, your birthday, your anniversary. You may notice that memories of him are slipping away.
And then, well, you come to realize that living alone isn’t so bad after all. You become a widowed parent with confidence. You somehow learn to do the “scary” things and the hard things and the impossible. You might even feel optimistic, and able to open yourself to new love, even though memories never disappear and you can absolutely count on the past tapping you on the shoulder when you least expect it…
Without a doubt, “Widows’ Words” is a book you never hope you need.
And yet, the chances are you will, as editor Nan Bauer- Maglin points out: statistically, “women outlive men by about five years” and, because Boomers are aging, the number of widows is rising. In 2016, nearly 1.5 million people lost a spouse; some two-thirds of them, she says, were women.
For them, this book follows an arc of need starting with what is imminent, a first part that reads like a howl of pain. Indeed, raw widows might want to go cautiously at those few chapters, lest they rip away fresh scabs. Ultimately, relief sets in: subsequent chapters show healing (or at least growing acceptance), and come from widows of all ages and walks of life including same-sex widows, interracial widows, and women with children who may or may not remember their fathers.
From these latter chapters comes gentle, wry humor and strong advice that feels like it’s offered in a warm blanket and a hug. It all makes “Widows’ Words” a great reference and good comfort even though, for the newly bereaved, it can’t begin to cover everything.
“Widows’ Words,” edited by Nan Bauer-Maglin, c.2019, Rutgers University Press, $24.95 / $28.95 Canada, 270 pages.
Activism
‘Resist’ a Look at Black Activism in U.S. Through the Eyes of a Native Nigerian
In 1995, after she and her brothers traveled from their native Nigeria to join their mother at her new home in the South Bronx, young Omokha’s eyes were opened. She quickly understood that the color of her skin – which was “synonymous with endless striving and a pursuit of excellence” in Nigeria – was “so problematic in America.”
By Terri Schlichenmeyer, The Bookworm Sez
Throughout history, when decisions were needed, the answer has often been “no.”
‘No,’ certain people don’t get the same education as others. ‘No,’ there is no such thing as equality. ‘No,’ voting can be denied and ‘no,’ the laws are different, depending on the color of one’s skin. And in the new book, “Resist!” by Rita Omokha, ‘no,’ there is not an obedient acceptance of those things.
In 1995, after she and her brothers traveled from their native Nigeria to join their mother at her new home in the South Bronx, young Omokha’s eyes were opened. She quickly understood that the color of her skin – which was “synonymous with endless striving and a pursuit of excellence” in Nigeria – was “so problematic in America.”
That became a bigger matter to Omokha later, 15 years after her brother was deported: she “saw” him in George Floyd, and it shook her. Troubled, she traveled to America on a “pilgrimage for understanding [her] Blackness…” She began to think about the “Black young people across America” who hadn’t been or wouldn’t be quiet about racism any longer.
She starts this collection of stories with Ella Josephine Baker, whose parents and grandparents modeled activism and who, because of her own student activism, would be “crowned the mother of the Civil Rights Movement.” Baker, in fact, was the woman who formed the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Committee, or SNCC, in 1960.
Nine teenagers, known as the Scottsboro Nine were wrongly arrested for raping two white women in 1931 and were all released, thanks to the determination of white lawyer-allies who were affiliated with the International Labor Defense and the outrage of students on campuses around America.
Students refused to let a “Gentleman’s Agreement” pass when it came to sports and equality in 1940. Barbara Johns demanded equal education under the law in Virginia in 1951. Huey Newton and Bobby Seale formed the Black Panther Party for Self-Defense in 1966. And after Trayvon Martin (2012) and George Floyd (2020) were killed, students used the internet as a new form of fighting for justice.
No doubt, by now, you’ve read a lot of books about activism. There are many of them out there, and they’re pretty hard to miss. With that in mind, there are reasons not to miss “Resist!”
You’ll find the main one by looking between the lines and in each chapter’s opening.
There, Omokha weaves her personal story in with that of activists at different times through the decades, matching her experiences with history and making the whole timeline even more relevant.
In doing so, the point of view she offers – that of a woman who wasn’t totally raised in an atmosphere filled with racism, who wasn’t immersed in it her whole life – lets these historical accounts land with more impact.
This book is for people who love history or a good, short biography, but it’s also excellent reading for anyone who sees a need for protest or action and questions the status quo. If that’s the case, then “Resist!” may be the answer.
“Resist! How a Century of Young Black Activists Shaped America” by Rita Omokha, c.2024, St. Martin’s Press. $29.00
Black History
Book Review: In Slavery’s Wake: Making Black Freedom in the World
It’s a tale of heroes: the Maroons, who created communities in unwanted swampland, and welcomed escaped slaves into their midst; Sarah Baartman, the “Hottentot Venus”; Marème Diarra, who walked more than 2000 miles from Sudan to Senegal with her children to escape slavery; enslaved farmers and horticulturists; and everyday people who still talk about slavery and what the institution left behind.
By Terri Schlichenmeyer
Ever since you learned how it happened you couldn’t get it out of your mind.
People, packed like pencils in a box, tightly next to each other, one by one by one, tier after tier. They couldn’t sit up, couldn’t roll over or scratch an itch or keep themselves clean on a ship that took them from one terrible thing to another. And in the new book “In Slavery’s Wake,” essays by various contributors, you’ll see what trailed in waves behind those vessels.
You don’t need to be told about the horrors of slavery. You’ve grown up knowing about it, reading about it, thinking about everything that’s happened because of it in the past four hundred years. And so have others: in 2014, a committee made of “key staff from several world museums” gathered to discuss “telling the story of racial slavery and colonialism as a world system…” so that together, they could implement a “ten-year road map to expand… our practices of truth telling…”
Here, the effects of slavery are compared to the waves left by a moving ship, a wake the story of which some have tried over time to diminish.
It’s a tale filled with irony. Says one contributor, early American Colonists held enslaved people but believed that King George had “unjustly enslaved” the colonists.
It’s the story of a British company that crafted shackles and cuffs and that still sells handcuffs “used worldwide by police and militaries” today.
It’s a tale of heroes: the Maroons, who created communities in unwanted swampland, and welcomed escaped slaves into their midst; Sarah Baartman, the “Hottentot Venus”; Marème Diarra, who walked more than 2000 miles from Sudan to Senegal with her children to escape slavery; enslaved farmers and horticulturists; and everyday people who still talk about slavery and what the institution left behind.
Today, discussions about cooperation and diversity remain essential.
Says one essayist, “… embracing a view of history with a more expansive definition of archives in all their forms must be fostered in all societies.”
Unless you’ve been completely unaware and haven’t been paying attention for the past 150 years, a great deal of what you’ll read inside “In Slavery’s Wake” is information you already knew and images you’ve already seen.
Look again, though, because this comprehensive book isn’t just about America and its history. It’s about slavery, worldwide, yesterday and today.
Casual readers – non-historians especially – will, in fact, be surprised to learn, then, about slavery on other continents, how Africans left their legacies in places far from home, and how the “wake” they left changed the worlds of agriculture, music, and culture. Tales of individual people round out the narrative, in legends that melt into the stories of others and present new heroes, activists, resisters, allies, and tales that are inspirational and thrilling.
This book is sometimes a difficult read and is probably best consumed in small bites that can be considered with great care to appreciate fully. Start “In Slavery’s Wake,” though, and you won’t be able to get it out of your mind.
Edited by Paul Gardullo, Johanna Obenda, and Anthony Bogues, Author: Various Contributors, c.2024, Smithsonian Books, $39.95
Arts and Culture
In ‘Affrilachia: Testimonies,’ Puts Blacks in Appalacia on the Map
By Terri Schlichenmeyer
The Bookworm Sez
An average oak tree is bigger around than two people together can reach.
That mighty tree starts out with an acorn the size of a nickel, ultimately growing to some 80 feet tall, with a canopy of a hundred feet or more across.
And like the new book, “Affrilachia” by Chris Aluka Berry (with Kelly Elaine Navies and Maia A. Surdam), its roots spread wide and wider.
Affriclachia is a term a Kentucky poet coined in the 1990s referring to the Black communities in Appalachia who are similarly referred to as Affrilachians.
In 2016, “on a foggy Sunday morning in March,” Berry visited Affrilachia for the first time by going the Mount Zion AME Zion Church in Cullowhee, North Carolina. The congregation was tiny; just a handful of people were there that day, but a pair of siblings stood out to him.
According to Berry, Ann Rogers and Mae Louise Allen lived on opposite sides of town, and neither had a driver’s license. He surmised that church was the only time the elderly sisters were together then, but their devotion to one another was clear.
As the service ended, he asked Allen if he could visit her. Was she willing to talk about her life in the Appalachians, her parents, her town?
She was, and arrangements were made, but before Barry could get back to Cullowhee, he learned that Allen had died. Saddened, he wondered how many stories are lost each day in mountain communities where African Americans have lived for more than a century.
“I couldn’t make photographs of the past,” he says, “but I could document the people and places living now.”
In doing so he also offers photographs that he collected from people he met in ‘Affrilachia,’ in North Carolina, Georgia, Kentucky, and Tennessee, at a rustic “camp” that was likely created by enslaved people, at churches, and in modest houses along highways.
The people he interviewed recalled family tales and community stories of support, hardship, and home.
Says coauthor Navies, “These images shout without making a sound.”
If it’s true what they say about a picture being worth 1,000 words, then “Affrilachia,” as packed with photos as it is, is worth a million.
With that in mind, there’s not a lot of narrative inside this book, just a few poems, a small number of very brief interviews, a handful of memories passed down, and some background stories from author Berry and his co-authors. The tales are interesting but scant.
For most readers, though, that lack of narrative isn’t going to matter much. The photographs are the reason why you’d have this book.
Here are pictures of life as it was 50 years or a century ago: group photos, pictures taken of proud moments, worn pews, and happy children. Some of the modern pictures may make you wonder why they’re included, but they set a tone and tell a tale.
This is the kind of book you’ll take off the shelf, and notice something different every time you do. “Affrilachia” doesn’t contain a lot of words, but it’s a good choice when it’s time to branch out in your reading.
“Affrilachia: Testimonies,” by Chris Aluka Berry with Kelly Elaine Navies and Maia A. Surdam
c.2024, University of Kentucky Press, $50.00.
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