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Black Mothers Gather Strength From Momference

THE AFRO — ikki Osei-Barrett and Simona Noce Wright, cofounders of District Motherhued that supports millennial moms of color in the DMV, created the Momference to celebrate Black mothers because they couldn’t find a conference that exclusively caters to them. The event embraces Black mothers, addresses their needs and shows them in a positive light. Beyond the conference, 80 moms met up Sunday morning for rooftop trap yoga and brunch.

Published

6 years ago

June 1, 2019

Oakland Post

By Lenore T. Adkins

When actress Tatyana Ali faced isolation as a new mom in a new city —San Francisco — she realized she had to find her own community of mothers.

“San Francisco’s wonderful, it’s very liberal, but it’s very segregated and so on the playground, you know, listening to other moms talk, I found that in some cases, I didn’t necessarily fit in with the moms that were there. And I didn’t necessarily fit in with the nannies that were there,” says Ali, 40, who has a two-year-old son and is expecting her second child in August. “I was somewhere in between I guess, or at least to some people that’s how they saw me.”

Ali, known for playing the beloved Ashley Banks on the 1990s sitcom “The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air,” found her mommy tribe by going to different parks and finding other like-minded moms. She used FaceTime to stay in constant contact with longtime girlfriends.

“Even if you’re in a segregated place, and you’re the only one there, there are cool gems of people in all of those places and I just didn’t stop until I found what I needed,” Ali said.

Ali, a Harvard alum, made her comments Saturday at the one-day Momference, billed as America’s first full-day conference centered on millennial moms of color. The sold-out event took place at the Renaissance Downtown D.C. hotel and attracted nearly 500 moms, including ticket holders, vendors and speakers.

Nikki Osei-Barrett and Simona Noce Wright, cofounders of District Motherhued that supports millennial moms of color in the DMV, created the Momference to celebrate Black mothers because they couldn’t find a conference that exclusively caters to them. The event embraces Black mothers, addresses their needs and shows them in a positive light. Beyond the conference, 80 moms met up Sunday morning for rooftop trap yoga and brunch.

“Black motherhood always looks like just struggle and stress and anger and poverty, when in fact, it’s not,” Osei-Barrett says. “And the Momference is an opportunity for us to really display Black mom magic and just gather a room full of affluent, gorgeous, educated Black women … and put that on a platform.”

At the event, moms met and networked with other moms, pampered themselves, shared their struggles and learned from experts about monitoring their physical and emotional health.

According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, Black women in the United States are three to four times more likely than White women to die of pregnancy complications, regardless of income or education.

Tausi Suedi, now the maternal and child health deputy director of centralized intake at the Baltimore City Health Department, said she didn’t feel like her doctors at another facility listened to her when she was beginning contractions with her first child.

She recalls telling her doctor, who was out of town, that the child was too big, and he authorized a Caesarean section. But the doctors onsite kept her in labor for two days, and she nearly died from the experience, she said.

Her advice is to fight back against the culture of blindly taking doctors’ advice, and to instead speak up if something doesn’t feel right, or if you’re in pain. If you aren’t in a position to do that, have your doula do it for you.

“Those theories are there that Black women have a higher threshold for pain, but that’s not necessarily the case,” says Suedi, a panelist on the conference’s panel that focused on maternal health, wellness and loss. “You know, for me to be in labor for two days because the doctors weren’t listening, and nearly dying, that was unacceptable.”

Helena Andrews-Dyer lives in the gentrifying Bloomingdale community and identifies with Ali’s struggles to find black moms in her neighborhood. The young white mothers Andrews-Dyers meets at the playground or the yoga studio don’t share her same concerns about motherhood, so being surrounded by women who look like her and have the same interests makes her feel like she’s not alone.

“Being around those women gives me strength,” says Andrews-Dyer, 39, who has a two-year-old daughter and is expecting another girl.

Meanwhile, this year’s Momference sold out in two days, and the inaugural Momference also sold out the year before. Organizers are figuring out how they’ll meet the demand next year — ideas include selling more tickets or adding another day to the conference.

That the event continues to sell out is a testament to how much it’s needed, Osei-Barrett says.

“You create experiences for Black women, we show up,” she told the AFRO.

This article originally appeared in The Afro.

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“Unnecessary Danger”: Gov. Newsom Blasts Rollback of Emergency Abortion Care Protections

Effective May 29, CMS rescinded guidance that had reinforced the obligation of hospitals to provide abortion services under the Emergency Medical Treatment and Labor Act (EMTALA) when necessary to stabilize a patient’s condition. Newsom warned that the rollback will leave patients vulnerable in states with strict or total abortion bans.

Published

3 days ago

June 14, 2025

Oakland Post

iStock.

By Bo Tefu, California Black Media

Gov. Gavin Newsom is criticizing the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services (CMS) for rolling back federal protections for emergency abortion care, calling the move an “unnecessary danger” to the lives of pregnant patients in crisis.

Newsom warned that the rollback will leave patients vulnerable in states with strict or total abortion bans.

“Today’s decision will endanger lives and lead to emergency room deaths, full stop,” Newsom said in a statement. “Doctors must be empowered to save the lives of their patients, not hem and haw over political red lines when the clock is ticking. In California, we will always protect the right of physicians to do what’s best for their patients and for women to make the reproductive decisions that are best for their families.”

The CMS guidance originally followed the 2022 Dobbs decision, asserting that federal law could preempt state abortion bans in emergency care settings. However, legal challenges from anti-abortion states created uncertainty, and the Trump administration’s dismissal of a key lawsuit against Idaho in March removed federal enforcement in those states.

While the rollback does not change California law, Newsom said it could discourage hospitals and physicians in other states from providing emergency care. States like Idaho, Mississippi, and Oklahoma do not allow abortion as a stabilizing treatment unless a patient’s life is already at risk.

California has taken several steps to expand reproductive protections, including the launch of Abortion.CA.Gov and leadership in the Reproductive Freedom Alliance, a coalition of 23 governors supporting access to abortion care.

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The Case Against Probate Part 2 – The Dr. Laura Dean Head Case

Zakiya Folami Jendayi says, “Dr. Laura Dean Head had two sisters but was estranged from them the entire 28 years we were friends.”Despite that fact, Head’s sisters, Della Hamlin and Helaine Head, questioned Head’s trust three times after Head transitioned, attempting to acquire Head’s estate, and three different attorneys told them they didn’t have standing. Dr. Head did not include either of her sisters in her trust or will. Dr. Head’s Trust included a disinheritance and no contest clause regarding her sisters.

Published

1 month ago

May 18, 2025

Oakland Post

Dr. Laura Dean Head, right, and Zakiya Jendayi, left. Dr. Head was Jendayi's academic advisor, mentor, sorority sister and dear friend for 28 years. Courtesy photo.

By Tanya Dennis

Dr. Laura Dean Head, a Black Studies professor at San Francisco State University for 35 years, transitioned on June 19, 2013. Aware of her imminent demise, Dr. Head appointed former student and friend for 28 years, Zakiya Folami Jendayi as trustee, executor, and sole beneficiary of her estate in front of several credible witnesses and a notary. Head also gave Jendayi power of attorney and appointed Jendayi as her advanced healthcare agent.

Jendayi says, “Laura had two sisters but was estranged from them the entire 28 years we were friends.”Despite that fact, Head’s sisters, Della Hamlin and Helaine Head, questioned Head’s trust three times after Head transitioned, attempting to acquire Head’s estate, and three different attorneys told them they didn’t have standing. Dr. Head did not include either of her sisters in her trust or will. Dr. Head’s Trust included a disinheritance and no contest clause regarding her sisters.

In 2020, Dr. Head’s deceased mother’s abandoned property for over 20 years sold, entitling Head’s estate to one-third of the proceeds. Jendayi filed a petition for distribution rights on behalf of Dr. Head’s estate. Head’s sisters responded, filing a lawsuit against Jendayi to invalidate Head’s trust, claiming Jendayi used undue influence and forgery, citing Head’s lack of capacity to make business decisions.

During trial, Della testified she had not seen Head since 1997 or 1998, and Helaine could not identify Dr. Head in a photo during her trial testimony. Head’s physician, Dr. Stephen Sarafian, wrote a letter and testified that Dr. Head lacked mental capacity, and her mental state rendered her unable to manage her own financial resources and/or to resist fraud or undue influence.

His letter had the wrong day, month, year and identified Dr. Head as a male. Jendayi filed a complaint against Sarafian with Kaiser’s grievance department and the Medical Board of California. Both agencies denounced Sarafian’s false letter.

When Jendayi subpoenaed Sarafian to testify a second time, Sarafian testified he had not performed a mental assessment on Dr. Head, had not diagnosed Dr. Head’s lack mental capacity, and had not determined if she could manage her own financial resources and/or resist fraud or undue influence,

During the 18-day trial, the sisters’ attorney, Daniel Leahy, stated that Jendayi named herself Head’s beneficiary. No one testified to that claim, nor was there any evidence. When Jendayi objected during the trial, Judge Sandra Bean stated, “it’s only argument.”

However, Bean accepted the “only argument” lie from Leahy, a court attorney who never met Dr. Head, over Dr. Head’s attorney, Elaine Lee, who testified that Dr. Head named Jendayi as her beneficiary after she met with Dr. Head privately. Bean ruled that Jendayi named herself beneficiary and unduly influenced Dr. Head.

Zendayi says “Trial transcripts show Bean’s extreme bias and discrimination against me, how Bean lawyered from the bench, abused her discretion, changed a witness testimony on the record and exhibited blatant racism.”

The Appellate Court upheld Bean’s ruling, They also ruled that Jendayi named herself beneficiary and relied on Sarafian’s invalid letter three times to uphold Bean’s ruling.

Jendayi then petitioned to the Supreme Court of California for justice, but the Court denied hearing her case. Jendayi is now headed to the Supreme Court of the United States seeking justice. Judge Bean has been contacted for comment, but thus far there has been no response.

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The Best Advice for Raising Children: Discipline That Makes Sense

In his book Developing Positive Self Images and Discipline in Black Children, Dr. Jawanza Kunjufu suggests that primary aims for socializing Black children should be: establishing goals related to God and the church; familiarizing children with religious texts like the Bible or Quran; educating them of Black culture like Khemetic (Egyptian) Civilization; enlightening them about Black leaders like Malcolm X and Sojourner Truth; and teaching them to strive to be employers, not employees.

Published

1 month ago

May 13, 2025

Oakland Post

Headshot of Dr. William A. Thomas. Photo courtesy of Dr. William A. Thomas.

By William A. Thomas, Ph.D.

In many African societies, the primary aim of socialization is to raise children to be socially responsible and eventually provide economic support to their parents and extended families. Ghanaian philosopher Kwame Gyekye taught that children are raised to be respectful of the wishes of their parents and extended adult family members.

In his book Developing Positive Self Images and Discipline in Black Children, Dr. Jawanza Kunjufu suggests that primary aims for socializing Black children should be: establishing goals related to God and the church; familiarizing children with religious texts like the Bible or Quran; educating them of Black culture like Khemetic (Egyptian) Civilization; enlightening them about Black leaders like Malcolm X and Sojourner Truth; and teaching them to strive to be employers, not employees.

Effective disciplinary strategies appropriate to a child’s age and development teach them to regulate their behavior; keep them from harm; enhance their cognitive, social, and emotional executive functioning skills; and reinforce the behavioral patterns taught by their parents and caregivers.

Below are some specific guidelines for disciplining children.

Listen to what children are talking about with interest and show them you understand their feelings. Remember, children mirror and learn about their emotional selves by hearing their feelings reflected back to them. Staying on target also means avoiding labels. When children fail to do what is expected, discussing it is helpful rather than saying how stubborn, lazy, dumb, or bad they are. By the same token, more positive labels can be helpful.

Dependability is another essential component of the discipline process. When parents are dependable, their children learn what to expect and are helped to feel secure. When parents are consistent, children learn to trust, that is, predict their parents’ behaviors with certainty. A child thinks, “When I spill something, I will always be asked to wipe it up.” A child thinks, “If I use foul language, I will always be corrected.” A child thinks, “If I take something that doesn’t belong to me, I will always have to give it back.” The ability to predict with certainty leads children to rely on their parents and the village/community in which they live. Children feel safe when they know what to expect.

Conclusions

It takes a village/community to raise the divine gift that is the Black child. Parents look to therapists for guidance concerning a variety of parenting issues, including discipline. Keep in mind that evidence suggests that corporal punishment is both ineffective in the long term and associated with cognitive and mental health disorders. When parents want guidance about the use of spanking, a child therapist can explore parental feelings, help them better define the goals of discipline, and offer specific behavior management strategies. In addition to providing appropriate education to families, the Bay Area Association of Black Psychologists (Bay ABPsi) can refer them to community resources, like parenting groups and classes.

About the Author

Dr. Thomas is a licensed clinical psychologist with a private practice in the SF/Oakland Bay Area and Beaumont. He is a member of Bay ABPsi, a healing resource committed to providing the Post Newspaper readership with monthly discussions about critical issues in Black Mental Health. Readers are welcome to join us at our monthly chapter meetings every 3^rd Saturday via Zoom and contact us at bayareaabpsi@gmail.com.