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Make Room for the Non-Binary

I am a Baby Boomer, born in 1957, who grew up in a very binary world. Everything from party affiliation to music preference was simplified down into an “either-or” mentality. Most of the time, what this really meant was that either you fit in or you didn’t.

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Person holds non-binary flag/Creative Commons

I am a Baby Boomer, born in 1957, who grew up in a very binary world. Everything from party affiliation to music preference was simplified down into an “either-or” mentality. Most of the time, what this really meant was that either you fit in or you didn’t.

Until recently, every form I’ve ever completed had two boxes to check for sex: male or female.

One can imagine the physical and mental health challenges that non-binary people face when their identities non-binary status are not recognized and instances assaults and abuse are underreported.

Everywhere I go, a similar dichotomy presents itself. Non-binary folks, whose gender identities are neither male nor female, are being erased and excluded from traditionally gendered spaces.

I identify as cisgender, which means that my birth sex (female) and gender (woman) align. I’m a Blesbian — Black lesbian — too, and, as a member of the LGBTQ+ community, I want to help by being an advocate for non-binary people, both within and outside of queer spaces.

Since 2020, many folks now introduce themselves with their name and pronouns: he/him, she/her, they/them, etc. This might be in part due to a year and a half of Zoom calls, where awkward clarifications of one’s gender identity can be easily avoided by listing pronouns next to names.

For cisgender allies of trans and non-binary people, stating your pronouns in your Twitter bio, office meetings, or the like is a way to help normalize the gender identities that exist outside of male and female. Gen Z-ers are leading this cultural shift towards tolerance of non-binary people in classrooms, on college campuses, and in the workplace. But some things are still the same.

In the first broad-based population study of non-binary folks, the Williams Institute at the UCLA School of Law concluded there are 1.2 million non-binary LGBTQ+ adults aged 18 to 60 in the United States. That’s 11% of the LGBTQ+ population.

The study found that the majority of non-binary LGBTQ+ adults are young, urban and white. More specifically, 58% of these non-binary folks are white, 16% are multiracial, 15% are Latinx, and 9% are Black. Non-binary people are also less likely to be straight than their cisgender counterparts: most identified as queer, bisexual, pansexual or asexual.

Non-binary (abbreviated enby), gender fluid, and/or genderqueer are terms for gender identities that do not check the male or female boxes. They/them are often the pronouns they use, though some people use variations of she/they or he/they or others like ze/hir, xe/xem, hy/hym or co/cos.

Among LGBTQ+ non-binary adults, 82% reported experiencing emotional abuse during childhood, 53% were bullied and 11% were exposed to conversion therapy. Nearly 94% say they have considered suicide; 39% have attempted it, the study found.

We know that Black transgender women are being murdered at a high rate in the United States, with many of those deaths being underreported and those folks being misgendered. Of the non-binary folks in the study, more than half reported being physically or sexually assaulted.

One can imagine the physical and mental health challenges that non-binary people face when their identities non-binary status are not recognized and instances assaults and abuse are underreported.

As our racial reckoning in this country continues, it should be inclusive of genderqueer and non-binary folks, because not everyone fits neatly into a category or box. This lesson applies to everything, whether it be in discussions of race, gender, or other socially constructed identities that inevitably leave someone behind.

Healing should be inclusive. Here’s to more education and acceptance.

This column was produced for The Progressive magazine and distributed by Tribune News Service.

Activism

Big God Ministry Gives Away Toys in Marin City

Pastor Hall also gave a message of encouragement to the crowd, thanking Jesus for the “best year of their lives.” He asked each of the children what they wanted to be when they grow up.

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From top left: Pastor David Hall asking the children what they want to be when they grow up. Worship team Jake Monaghan, Ruby Friedman, and Keri Carpenter. Children lining up to receive their presents. Photos by Godfrey Lee.
From top left: Pastor David Hall asking the children what they want to be when they grow up. Worship team Jake Monaghan, Ruby Friedman, and Keri Carpenter. Children lining up to receive their presents. Photos by Godfrey Lee.

By Godfrey Lee

Big God Ministries, pastored by David Hall, gave toys to the children in Marin City on Monday, Dec. 15, on the lawn near the corner of Drake Avenue and Donahue Street.

Pastor Hall also gave a message of encouragement to the crowd, thanking Jesus for the “best year of their lives.” He asked each of the children what they wanted to be when they grew up.

Around 75 parents and children were there to receive the presents, which consisted mainly of Gideon Bibles, Cat in the Hat pillows, Barbie dolls, Tonka trucks, and Lego building sets.

A half dozen volunteers from the Big God Ministry, including Donnie Roary, helped to set up the tables for the toy giveaway. The worship music was sung by Ruby Friedman, Keri Carpenter, and Jake Monaghan, who also played the accordion.

Big God Ministries meets on Sundays at 10 a.m. at the Mill Valley Community Center, 180 Camino Alto, Mill Valley, CA Their phone number is (415) 797-2567.

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Activism

First 5 Alameda County Distributes Over $8 Million in First Wave of Critical Relief Funds for Historically Underpaid Caregivers

“Family, Friend, and Neighbor caregivers are lifelines for so many children and families in Alameda County,” said Kristin Spanos, CEO, First 5 Alameda County. “Yet, they often go unrecognized and undercompensated for their labor and ability to give individualized, culturally connected care. At First 5, we support the conditions that allow families to thrive, and getting this money into the hands of these caregivers and families at a time of heightened financial stress for parents is part of that commitment.”

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Costco. Courtesy image.
Costco. Courtesy image.

Family, Friend, and Neighbor Caregivers Can Now Opt Into $4,000 Grants to Help Bolster Economic Stability and Strengthen Early Learning Experiences

By Post Staff

Today, First 5 Alameda County announced the distribution of $4,000 relief grants to more than 2,000 Family, Friend, and Neighbor (FFN) caregivers, totaling over $8 million in the first round of funding. Over the full course of the funding initiative, First 5 Alameda County anticipates supporting over 3,000 FFN caregivers, who collectively care for an estimated 5,200 children across Alameda County. These grants are only a portion of the estimated $190 million being invested into expanding our early childcare system through direct caregiver relief to upcoming facilities, shelter, and long-term sustainability investments for providers fromMeasure C in its first year. This investment builds on the early rollout of Measure C and reflects a comprehensive, system-wide strategy to strengthen Alameda County’s early childhood ecosystem so families can rely on sustainable, accessible care,

These important caregivers provide child care in Alameda County to their relatives, friends, and neighbors. While public benefits continue to decrease for families, and inflation and the cost of living continue to rise, these grants provide direct economic support for FFN caregivers, whose wages have historically been very low or nonexistent, and very few of whom receive benefits. As families continue to face growing financial pressures, especially during the winter and holiday season, these grants will help these caregivers with living expenses such as rent, utilities, supplies, and food.

“Family, Friend, and Neighbor caregivers are lifelines for so many children and families in Alameda County,” said Kristin Spanos, CEO, First 5 Alameda County. “Yet, they often go unrecognized and undercompensated for their labor and ability to give individualized, culturally connected care. At First 5, we support the conditions that allow families to thrive, and getting this money into the hands of these caregivers and families at a time of heightened financial stress for parents is part of that commitment.”

The funding for these relief grants comes from Measure C, a local voter-approved sales tax in Alameda County that invests in young children, their families, communities, providers, and caregivers. Within the first year of First 5’s 5-Year Plan for Measure C, in addition to the relief grants to informal FFN caregivers, other significant investments will benefit licensed child care providers. These investments include over $40 million in Early Care and Education (ECE) Emergency Grants, which have already flowed to nearly 800 center-based and family child care providers. As part of First 5’s 5-Year Plan, preparations are also underway to distribute facilities grants early next year for child care providers who need to make urgent repairs or improvements, and to launch the Emergency Revolving Fund in Spring 2026 to support licensed child care providers in Alameda County who are at risk of closure.

The FFN Relief Grants recognize and support the essential work that an estimated 3,000 FFN caregivers provide to 5,200 children in Alameda County. There is still an opportunity to receive funds for FFN caregivers who have not yet received them.

In partnership with First 5 Alameda County, Child Care Payment Agencies play a critical role in identifying eligible caregivers and leading coordinated outreach efforts to ensure FFN caregivers are informed of and able to access these relief funds.FFN caregivers are eligible for the grant if they receive a child care payment from an Alameda County Child Care Payment Agency, 4Cs of Alameda County, BANANAS, Hively, and Davis Street, and are currently caring for a child 12 years old or younger in Alameda County. Additionally, FFN caregivers who provided care for a child 12 years or younger at any time since April 1, 2025, but are no longer doing so, are also eligible for the funds. Eligible caregivers are being contacted by their Child Care Payment Agency on a rolling basis, beginning with those who provided care between April and July 2025.

“This money is coming to me at a critical time of heightened economic strain,” said Jill Morton, a caregiver in Oakland, California. “Since I am a non-licensed childcare provider, I didn’t think I was eligible for this financial support. I was relieved that this money can help pay my rent, purchase learning materials for the children as well as enhance childcare, buy groceries and take care of grandchildren.”

Eligible FFN caregivers who provided care at any time between April 1, 2025 and July 31, 2025, who haven’t yet opted into the process, are encouraged to check their mail and email for an eligibility letter. Those who have cared for a child after this period should expect to receive communications from their child care payment agency in the coming months. FFN caregivers with questions may also contact the agency they work with to receive child care payments, or the First 5 Alameda help desk, Monday through Friday, from 9 a.m. to 5:00 p.m. PST, at 510-227-6964. The help desk will be closed 12/25/25 – 1/1/26. Additional grant payments will be made on a rolling basis as opt-ins are received by the four child care payment agencies in Alameda County.

Beginning in the second year of Measure C implementation, FFN caregivers who care for a child from birth to age five and receive an Alameda County subsidized voucher will get an additional $500 per month. This amounts to an annual increase of about $6,000 per child receiving a subsidy. Together with more Measure C funding expected to flow back into the community as part of First 5’s 5-Year Plan, investments will continue to become available in the coming year for addressing the needs of childcare providers in Alameda County.

About First 5 Alameda County

First 5 Alameda County builds the local childhood systems and supports needed to ensure our county’s youngest children are safe, healthy, and ready to succeed in school and life.

Our Mission

In partnership with the community, we support a county-wide continuous prevention and early intervention system that promotes optimal health and development, narrows disparities, and improves the lives of children from birth to age five and their families.

Our Vision

Every child in Alameda County will have optimal health, development, and well-being to reach their greatest potential. 

Learn more at www.first5alameda.org.

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Activism

2025 in Review: Seven Questions for Assemblymember Lori Wilson — Advocate for Equity, the Environment, and More

Her rise has also included several historic firsts: she is the only Black woman ever appointed to lead the influential Assembly Transportation Committee, and the first freshman legislator elected Chair of the California Legislative Black Caucus. She has also been a vocal advocate for vulnerable communities, becoming the first California legislator to publicly discuss being the parent of a transgender child — an act of visibility that has helped advanced representation at a time when political tensions related to social issues and culture have intensified. 

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Assemblymember Lori D. Wilson (D-Suisun City). File photo.
Assemblymember Lori D. Wilson (D-Suisun City). File photo.

By Edward Henderson, California Black Media 

Assemblymember Lori D. Wilson (D-Suisun City) joined the California Legislature in 2022 after making history as Solano County’s first Black female mayor, bringing with her a track record of fiscal discipline, community investment, and inclusive leadership.

She represents the state’s 11th Assembly District, which spans Solano County and portions of Contra Costa and Sacramento Counties.

Her rise has also included several historic firsts: she is the only Black woman ever appointed to lead the influential Assembly Transportation Committee, and the first freshman legislator elected Chair of the California Legislative Black Caucus. She has also been a vocal advocate for vulnerable communities, becoming the first California legislator to publicly discuss being the parent of a transgender child — an act of visibility that has helped advanced representation at a time when political tensions related to social issues and culture have intensified.

California Black Media spoke with Wilson about her successes and disappointments this year and her outlook for 2026.

What stands out as your most important achievement this year?

Getting SB 237 passed in the Assembly. I had the opportunity to co-lead a diverse workgroup of colleagues, spanning a wide range of ideological perspectives on environmental issues.

How did your leadership contribute to improving the lives of Black Californians this year?

The Black Caucus concentrated on the Road to Repair package and prioritized passing a crucial bill that remained incomplete during my time as chair, which establishes a process for identifying descendants of enslaved people for benefit eligibility.

What frustrated you the most this year?

The lack of progress made on getting Prop 4 funds allocated to socially disadvantaged farmers. This delay has real consequences. These farmers have been waiting for essential support that was promised. Watching the process stall, despite the clear need and clear intent of the voters, has been deeply frustrating and reinforces how much work remains to make our systems more responsive and equitable.

What inspired you the most this year?

The resilience of Californians persists despite the unprecedented attacks from the federal government. Watching people stay engaged, hopeful, and determined reminded me why this work matters and why we must continue to protect the rights of every community in our state.

What is one lesson you learned this year that will inform your decision-making next year?

As a legislator, I have the authority to demand answers to my questions — and accept nothing less. That clarity has strengthened my approach to oversight and accountability.

In one word, what is the biggest challenge Black Californians are facing currently?

Affordability and access to quality educational opportunities.

What is the goal you want to achieve most in 2026?

Advance my legislative agenda despite a complex budget environment. The needs across our communities are real, and even in a tight fiscal year, I’m committed to moving forward policies that strengthen safety, expand opportunity, and improve quality of life for the people I represent.

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