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The Silent Struggle of Pregnancy Loss

It is a tragedy that Black women’s odds of pregnancy loss are much higher than the general population. It’s even more tragic that there is a Black woman reading this article who has experienced pregnancy loss and has suffered in silence. There are an array of feelings associated with pregnancy loss, and women often feel alone and isolated in these feelings believing that no one understands what they are going through.

Published

1 year ago

December 15, 2023

Oakland Post

Narissa Harris. Photo Credit Art Harris.

By Narissa Harris, LMFT

The topic and contents of this article may be difficult for some readers. Yet, it is of paramount importance to shed light on the silent struggle of pregnancy loss experienced by countless women.

During the holiday season, we often assume everyone is in a festive, happy mood. However, this time of year is filled with mixed emotions and can be especially difficult for Black women, who are 2-3 times more likely to experience a pregnancy loss compared to other women. Pregnancy loss (the death of an unborn baby/fetus during pregnancy) is experienced by 10-15% of women and doubles to 20-30% for Black women. Additionally, Black women are 3 times more likely to have a stillbirth in comparison to other women.

It is a tragedy that Black women’s odds of pregnancy loss are much higher than the general population. It’s even more tragic that there is a Black woman reading this article who has experienced pregnancy loss and has suffered in silence. There are an array of feelings associated with pregnancy loss, and women often feel alone and isolated in these feelings, believing that no one understands what they are going through.

Whether you are aware that someone has experienced pregnancy loss, or you have experienced pregnancy loss yourself, we must be sensitive and supportive to the women in our lives during this time of year. I encourage the following:

#1 – Don’t ask a woman about her uterus!

Yes, I know this is blunt and harsh, but it is important to be mindful of the trauma that may be triggered when asking a woman when she plans to have a baby. I will never forget being at a holiday party when a family member asked me when I was planning on having kids, unaware that I experienced my 3rd pregnancy loss just 6 weeks prior. It was triggering, upsetting, and annoying. While my husband and I were eventually blessed with 2 healthy children, I share my experience to reiterate the immediate and long-term harm caused by these types of invasive inquiries.

#2 – Connect with a supportive community!

If you are someone who has experienced a pregnancy loss or know a woman who has, it is vital to connect with a safe and supportive community even when everything is telling you (or that woman) to isolate. While no one in the chapter knew that I was dealing with pregnancy loss at the time, my connection with the Bay Area Chapter of the Association of Black Psychologists (Bay-ABPsi) served as a healing and uplifting space for my grief/loss. I learned from Baba Dr. Wade Nobles, who describes babies as divine and the closest beings to God. I want you to remember that connecting with our spiritual community and ancestors can offer healing and support.

#3 – Never lose hope!

To the women who have experienced pregnancy loss, it’s easy to believe that a successful pregnancy will not happen but keep the hope. Take the time you need to grieve and release the baby (or babies), allowing your womb to heal. View the lost pregnancy in terms of a spirit with a Divine purpose, even if it was short-lived, with you being the vessel for that Divine purpose. Believe and prepare for your baby, who will survive and succeed beyond the womb to fulfill their Divine purpose!

Bay ABPsi is a healing resource committed to providing the Post Newspaper readership with monthly discussions about critical issues in Black Mental Health. Readers are welcome to contact us at bayareaabpsi@gmail.com and join us at our monthly chapter meetings every 3rd Saturday via Zoom.

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Oakland Post: Week of December 18 – 24, 2024

The printed Weekly Edition of the Oakland Post: Week of December 18 – 24, 2024

Published

1 day ago

December 20, 2024

Oakland Post

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‘Donald Trump Is Not a God:’ Rep. Bennie Thompson Blasts Trump’s Call to Jail Him

“Donald Trump is not a god,” U.S. Rep. Bennie Thompson, D-Miss., told The Grio during a recent interview, reacting to Trump’s unsupported claims that the congressman, along with other committee members like vice chair and former Republican Rep. Liz Cheney, destroyed evidence throughout the investigation.

Published

4 days ago

December 18, 2024

Oakland Post

Congressman Bennie Thompson, D-Miss. Courtesy photo.

By Post Staff

U.S. Rep. Bennie Thompson, D-Miss., said he not intimidated by President-elect Donald Trump, who, during an interview on “Meet the Press,” called for the congressman to be jailed for his role as chairman of the special congressional committee investigating Trump’s role in the Jan. 6, 2021, mob attack on the U.S. Capitol.

“Donald Trump is not a god,” Thompson told The Grio during a recent interview, reacting to Trump’s unsupported claims that the congressman, along with other committee members like vice chair and former Republican Rep. Liz Cheney, destroyed evidence throughout the investigation.

“He can’t prove it, nor has there been any other proof offered, which tells me that he really doesn’t know what he’s talking about,” said the 76-year-old lawmaker, who maintained that he and the bipartisan Jan. 6 Select Committee – which referred Trump for criminal prosecution – were exercising their constitutional and legislative duties.

“When someone disagrees with you, that doesn’t make it illegal; that doesn’t even make it wrong,” Thompson said, “The greatness of this country is that everyone can have their own opinion about any subject, and so for an incoming president who disagrees with the work of Congress to say ‘because I disagree, I want them jailed,’ is absolutely unbelievable.”

When asked by The Grio if he is concerned about his physical safety amid continued public ridicule from Trump, whose supporters have already proven to be violent, Thompson said, “I think every member of Congress here has to have some degree of concern, because you just never know.”

This story is based on a report from The Grio.

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City of Oakland Celebrates Reopening of Main Library

“Libraries are such critical facilities for all Oaklanders, whether it’s children coming to story-time, adults reading the newspapers or borrowing the latest novels, and people engaging with a range of services and programs that the library hosts,” said Council President and District 2 Councilmember Nikki Fortunato Bas. “Such library services and programs are only possible when the facility’s electricity, heating, roof, and lighting are fixed and running efficiently. I’m proud to join this re-opening of our Main Public Library.”

Published

4 days ago

December 18, 2024

Oakland Post

Left to Right- Jamie Turbak, Director of Library Services, LaTonda Simmons, Assistant City Administrator, Nikki Bas, President Oakland City Council, Shen Thao, Mayor of Oakland, Carroll Fife, Oakland City Councilmember District 3, Harold Duffey, Assistant City Administrator, Sean Maher, Projects Coordinator. Photo by Kevin Hicks.

The branch had been closed since May for critical infrastructure upgrades

Special to the Post

The City of Oakland leadership and community partners gathered to celebrate the reopening of the Main Library after completion of critical infrastructure upgrades to enhance the library’s facilities and provide a better experience for patrons.

Renovations include new roof installation, skylight repair, critical electrical system upgrades, new boiler control system installation, auditorium heating and cooling system installation, and improvements to lighting, flooring and ceilings throughout the building.

“This is truly something to celebrate, the reopening of our wonderful Main Library! I congratulate the staff and our partners for this important project to make the Main Library a more comfortable place for everyone for years to come, said Oakland Mayor Sheng Thao. “Thank you to Oakland voters and the California State Library for making these crucial improvements possible.”

“Public libraries are a wonderful resource for our residents, offering a safe space for learning and being,” said District 3 Councilmember Carroll Fife. “It is critical to improve and modernize our libraries so more members of our community can utilize and enjoy them. I’m excited that the necessary renovations to the Main Library have been completed successfully and thank everyone involved, particularly the City team, who helped secured the necessary grant funds for this work.”

“I am proud of the City staff and project partners who kept this important project on schedule and under budget,” said Assistant City Administrator G. Harold Duffey. “The library is an incredibly important resource for our community members, and this project is an investment into the library’s future.”

“December 2nd was a momentous occasion for Oakland Public Library as we proudly reopened the doors of the Main Library following extensive infrastructure repairs,” said Director of Library Services Jamie Turbak. “Closing the Main Library for six months was no easy decision, as it serves as the central hub for our library system and is truly the heart of Oakland. Yet, this renovation was essential, representing more than just physical upgrades—it reflects our ongoing commitment to creating a safe, welcoming space for everyone.”

The City Administrator Jestin Johnson also attended the press conference and signalled his support for the completion of the record-setting completion of the renovations. Gay Plair Cobb, a newly appointed Library Commissioner said the Library represents the soul and brains of our community.

The Oakland Public Library secured funding for these crititcal repairs through a variety of sources. The California State Library’s Building Forward Library Facilities Improvement Program awarded the Main Branch $4.2 million. To comply with the grant terms, the City of Oakland provided matching funds through Measures KK, as approved by the Oakland City Council in October 2023.

The Main Library will host an Open House to celebrate the reopening on February 22, 2025, 10 a.m. – 5:00 p.m.

About the Oakland Public Library

The Oakland Public Library is a part of the City of Oakland in California and has been in existence since 1878. Locations include 16 neighborhood branches, a Main Library, a Second Start Adult Literacy Program, the Oakland Tool Lending Library, and the African American Museum and Library at Oakland (AAMLO). The Oakland Public Library empowers all people to explore, connect, and grow. Oaklandlibrary.org